ugh.

Sometimes my heart aches, and sometimes I feel like it could burst for happiness.

no one said it would be easy.

I figure no one has read this thing in a while. But, I feel like I need to write, or the words will just spill out of my eyes in some strange sort of way. I don't know. That makes no sense. A lot of stuff doesn't make much sense lately. Loss is strange that way. Loss takes things that used to make sense and twists them until they're unrecognizable.

Losing someone who has been your only anchor, your only constant, for over 3 years is terrifying. It's hard to give that sort of security up. But sometimes, giving it up is the only option, for your sake and for theirs... And that's not an easy idea to grasp-- letting someone go so they can be okay. It requires a different kind of trust and faith in that person...

I know it's for the best. I just wish it were easier to see him go... even though it may not be forever.